Blood Bubbles

They said I was an accomplice, but I don’t know what that means.  My sister was in the bushes with a boy and they said it broke the chastity laws.  She wasn’t supposed to have any unsanctioned relationships they said and I think they knew he would give her food afterwards.  They really don’t like people who get food without using the mark.

Lola my sister was really happy once, but she’s sad all the time now.  I know it’s because she’s trying to take care of me but the government makes it really hard to do that for people without the mark.  I’m really glad that we didn’t take the mark though.  They killed mom and dad for it, but I’m still glad we didn’t take the mark.  I guess they let us live because they think eventually we’ll join their team instead.  But I’d never ever want to join their side.  There isn’t anything they do that isn’t bad.

Yeah, they have free blood ferries and healing clinics but those people don’t usually last more than 3 weeks after they’ve been healed anyway.  We’ve lasted 6 months on our own, so I think we’re doing ok.  I wish we could make it out to the mountains; they say there’re places to hide and you can live off the lichen that grows because of the condensation from the atmosphere or something like that.  It’s probably contaminated, but at least you aren’t hungry.

We took a vacation in the mountains one time.  They had trees back then, big tall ones with awesome triangle tops.  I kind of remember putting lights on a tree that looked like that when I was a kid.  I mean, yeah, I’m still a bit of a kid now, but that doesn’t count.  I’m in prison.  Real kids don’t get put in prison.

Lola and I were trying to find the mountains, but we needed food every day so it took us a long time to go anywhere.  She doesn’t like boys but eventually she figured out that if they laid down with her, they’d give her food when they got back up.  I don’t really know what’s so important about that because I wouldn’t give away my food for anything but apparently there’s something special about laying down on top of a girl in the bushes.  Lola never told me what, but she would have explained it to me if I needed to know.

I’ve tried hunting a few things so she doesn’t have to lay down so much and we can leave the city faster, but there isn’t much left on the streets or in the backyards at this point.  One of the gang runners showed me how to trap mice and frogs, but mostly the mice are crippled and spotted now so you shouldn’t eat those if you can help it.

My friend Isaiah told me about a valley with lots of rivers where the plants still grew because it wasn’t blood but real live water in the streams  If there’s plants, then anything can live there and you might make it until after the end.  I’m not sure if it really exists, but if Lola and I could get over the mountains and strong enough on lichen to go down the other side, we were going to try to find that valley and be happy there together until everything quit being awful all the time.

Sometimes I miss my mom and dad and I wish they could’ve come with us.  My dad was really smart, which is probably why the government killed him one of the first ones.  My mom liked to make really beautiful pictures that made people laugh and cry and that’s probably why they killed her, too.  The government had promised they got a promotion, but dad told me before they left that he and mom were never coming back and Lola and I should take care of each other and wait patiently.  I don’t really know what we’re waiting for but I kind of think it must be awesome if dad told us to stick around.

Lola doesn’t talk very much but I noticed she’s making marks on her arms now.  Not marks like the mark.  More like scratches that leave scars.  She must be counting something, though I don’t know what because the numbers don’t match the days or anything.  I keep time by myself, and we were making it for 6 months before we got arrested.

I don’t think they’ll really let us go so we’ll probably have to find a way to escape.  I’m so tired of hearing them marching up and down the halls and the twirly, bubbly music they play makes me sick.  The food they feed us is pretty great but it makes me stay up at night with bad dreams.